Last week, my good friend Anthony Calypso and I had a conversation about his latest piece for TheGrio.com, which addressed a "dirty secret…that blacks don't tip well." Our chat led me to think about not just tipping but also the value that we place on each other–whether its in hiring and pay or patronage. Could it also be that black labor is considered less valuable by other black folk?

Certainly we've all heard and likely experienced the horror stories of "buying black," moments in which our desire to express racial solidarity goes awry. But we also have numerous stories of thriving black businesses and happy and loyal black patrons.

Still, I believe there is a larger conversation at play. One only has to look mainstream as a suggestion toward an answer. There is no secret that African Americans experience greater gaps in income and employment, and experience higher levels of unemployment than whites. Black women, for example, still earn just 64 cents for ever dollar earned by a white male.

So, there is that. But I wonder, have we internalized this de-valuation of each other? What do you think?

(Ok, I know this isn't exactly a "tech" topic, but over the years, I have had numerous conversations with black technologists on issues such as venture funding, access to resources, theft of intellectual property–a host of cases of black-on-black dealings that lead me to believe that the issue goes deeper than inadequate tipping. Thoughts?)

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• Mike Green: Assigning Value to Race: The Reid-Matthews Dilemma (huffingtonpost.com)

File this one under “Why Sonya shouldn’t read old email threads”

Remember that episode of the Cosby Show, when Theo brings home Ds and makes the argument to Cliff that he should love him because he’s his son? Theo just wants to be  “regular people,” and regular people don’t need to excel, right? I’ll refresh your memory. Remember how stupid you felt when, after you applauded Theo's heartfelt speech, Cliff said, "That's the dumbest thing I've ever heard in my life?"

So this morning, I'm reading  email from a PR rep who had previously connected me with the CEO of a pretty cool company. Good guy, great technology. I wanted them to connect me with African American entrepreneurs and small businesses using their product. It took them a while, but he sent me a lovely email saying he’d found a couple of people willing to talk about how they use the products, results, challenges, etc. Cool enough. But since our  communications had pretty much happened in a fog for me, I decided to rewind. (I had done the interview with a migraine the size of Nebraska, followed up by an ear infection and removal of four wisdom teeth–recovering in a Vicodin haze with the first chapter of my dissertation due. Yeah, that's my life.)

The PR rep’s previous email mentioned that he had spoken with SEVERAL DOZEN African American entrepreneurs and small businesses that used their product (several dozen seems a stretch, but he's a good guy, so I'll buy it for a nickel), but that many did not want to participate in my story for fear of revealing their “secret sauce.”

CUE THE RAGE:  Are you kidding me? So these Theos have found a tool that works really well for them, and in this environment of social networking, in which sharing is the smart thing to do because it means growth and survival, they are quite comfortable being "regular people."  You know, getting Ds, hoping we'll just love them because they're well…you know.

I'm not mad because they don't want to speak with me. I'm sure some had legitimate reasons for not wanting their companies to be featured in the mag.  I am also sensitive to the fact that black companies can be vulnerable in certain business spaces (especially technology), and publicity can make them ever more so.  But the crabs-in-a-bucket reasoning just gets me. Really, black people? Hate to break it to you, but the company's technology is a secret only to you. What "secret" are you keeping? From whom?

For the two companies who stepped up and agreed to share their "secret," THANK YOU. Folks can read about them in Black Enterprise magazine and on the site . Hopefully, their generosity and experiences will help others–and them–succeed.

And for the Theos…here's a present for you.

++++++++

On a completely unrelated tangent, Im using Zemanta to write this post, and pics of Frederick Douglass keep popping up. WTH??? (and yes, this is the radio version of my blog)